The Approval of The “Theys”

I believe we’ve all done it. Explained why you were too afraid to pursue your dreams because “they” wouldn’t think you are smart enough, pretty enough, accomplished enough, edgy enough to succeed. Or, for us Christians, we do the “they” will question my salvation, motives, throw in the “did God say you can do that…,” and we take all of that on and determine that we can’t do what’s so deeply imbedded in our souls.

The thing is, as I’ve been diligent in seeking God and asking for His help, I realize more and more “they” don’t matter. “They” can’t see the vision God placed in your heart. “They” may be filtering your dream through their insecurities. “They” will not have to stand before God and respond on your behalf when asked “Daughter, what did you do with your talents?”

Along with several podcasts, I’ve been listening to this book by Rachel Hollis, Girl, Stop Apologizing, and it has been breaking the fear of the “theys” off of my heart. More so, it’s been breaking off the need for their approval. My entire life I’ve wanted to be accepted, in the in-crowd, with the popular group, seen as someone worthy of, well, worth. I’ve always felt less than everyone around me. Even as I share this I can feel my throat tightening and eyes begin to burn. The question that has always nagged me is “why am I not enough?” Most of my life I’ve been the goofey girl, outspoken girl, odd friend of the pretty-girls, the different relative, second-last-never picked-replaced person.

And then I realized… I have always been picked, accepted, worth love and seen.

God our Father has been so sweetly speaking to every lie that was etched into my core at a very young age. I’ve never been invisible to the One that matters most. I’ve always been loved by my Father, even with me trying to understand a father’s love. I was never last pick with Jesus. He chose me first. He loved me first. He saw me first. He dove into the festering anger, rejection and shame I was sitting in, pulled me out and has been so tenderly and deliberately wiping me clean ever since.

I can’t help but cry at that revelation. The revelation that when my friends mom told me I would never be successful if I didn’t finish college, doesn’t matter. I am successful. When an ex-boyfriend told me he wished I was more like another woman he admired, it doesn’t matter. I am loved by an incredible man that only has eyes for me. When I was convinced I needed to be less “vocal” and less aggressive by those that took issue with my honesty (mind you, it did need to be finessed lol), that doesn’t matter. That very vocalness and aggression is what gives me the courage to be vulnerable with you.

The revelation that every shameful thing I’ve ever done in my past will never cancel out the call God has on my life because it’s not up to me to make it all come to pass. My job is to be brave and obedient.

Don’t you see, Lovely? “They” only ever carried weight because you gave them that weight. When you’re young it’s harder to decipher when you’ve begun to live your life through someone else’s opinions but now you can take that power back. Now you can take the brave step of living your life knowing you CAN DO all things through Christ who strengthens you. Now you can create that business, app, clothing line because it doesn’t matter if it’s never been done that way. Start the ministry, write the book, take the class…whatever it is, DO IT.

“They” don’t matter. As long as you’re in line with God’s call on your life, open to healthy counsel, and palms up and open with what God has given you, GO FOR IT! You don’t need their approval to do what you know you were created to do.

So, the next time you have the thought, “what will they think?” ask yourself, “Why does God think?”